What do I know about Relationships?
So when this site was just an idea, I asked for help on what to call it. Upon reading my idea, someone who knew me from my past relationship questioned…”How can I write about relationships if I never loved anyone.”
Actually I have been in love before. I do know the feeling. But to their credit, they did not know me back then. She only knows that I’ve been in a relationship that ended after four years. The primary reason of the breakup being I didn’t love my ex. My ex decided she needed to find someone to love her, so we broke up. So as long as she has known me, I stayed four years with a woman I never loved. So lets continue with her point of view. I’ll be the first to say, I don’t have all the answers. I have learned a lot about women through friendships and two long term relationships with some wonderful women. I’m not an expert, but I do know that love does not conquer all. At the least, both participants must bring communication, trust, and responsibility in addition to love to have a chance at a long lasting healthy relationship. Both people must possess these attributes for the relationship to last. I know, because some of these attributes my ex and I possessed and others we did not. The important thing is too learn from it. If you want advice on relationships, talk to people you trust. Always question your source. We all are human. Some single people want you to be single with them. There are men and women who harbor harsh feelings towards the opposite sex based on their pass experiences. You can not ask a bitter person for advice on how to continue a good relationship that is going though a bad period. Their solution will quickly be to break off the relationship. Do not talk to your bitter friends. Talk to those that are unbiased. Who can give you an objective opinion. if you want to make a struggling relationship work, talk to someone who is happily married. Find out what their struggles were and how they got passed them. I know a lot about relationships based on my good and bad experiences. I have learned so much from making mistakes in a relationship and coming back to the table to make it better. You can learn as much from an honest person who is willing to share why they are still married for 30 years as you can from a person who let the love of their life slip through their hands. So in answering the question, I know a lot about relationships, but I have so much more to learn. More importantly, this site was not created for me and my views. It was created for us. I have a lot to say, but I have a lot to learn. This site is for us. I look forward to all of your views, input and advice based on your experiences, the good and bad.
That’s all I got to say.
What you got to say?
Tags: Miscellaneous, Relationships
September 28th, 2008 at 8:02 pm
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October 9th, 2008 at 2:19 pm
What do I know about Relationships? Nothing! The only thing that I know is that I am probably not going to get married…it would be nice to find someone that shares my same outlook on that…I think being together is enough without the title of husband and wife…but throughout the years, as I get older, that could change. It’s sad that someone would say that you don’t know about relationships because you have never loved. You have to wonder if maybe the problem is loving yourself enough to have the love for another person. I am struggling with that right now, and working on it everyday. Loving myself. It’s a process.
October 10th, 2008 at 12:50 am
Like you said, to know anything about relationships, you should talk to couples who have great relationships. You should also read. Just like you would investigate anything else you were interested in. If you want to get a car, or a new house, you’re gonna do your research right?? As for my experience in love, well….THAT’S WHY I GOTTA READ!! I do know that I will never again try to give everything to a person who only wants 25%! Anyway, I want someone who can cover my annointing! If our child is sick, this man gotta know how to pray! IF he is the head of my household, he better be led by God! Sisters, I read some great books:”Embrace Your Greatness, Vol. I” By Dawn M. Harvey and The Women of EYG” and “Your Knight in Shining Armor: Discovering Your Lifelong Love by PB Wilson”. I hope they encourage you as much as they did me.
October 10th, 2008 at 9:09 am
I have to slightly disagree on this one….you can talk to people who have been hurt, maybe not while they are bitterly-bitter, but after some of the bitterness has let up. If you listen with an open ear, you can see the mistakes made and learn, so you don’t make them yourself. Also talking to a man or woman that has been hurt, will help you if you ever find yourself dealing with a person who has been hurt.
October 26th, 2008 at 12:43 am
There is always knowledge to be gained whether from experience or word of mouth: the key is to take what learned and apply it to the best of your ability with whom you desire to be for real about. I love currently for reasons far beyond which I ever imagined would be ME. I’m a trooper I roll with the punches but await to meet my King and hope he completes not only me but my children as well. One who I don’t mind respecting one who I smile to see one who you know ladies makes you warm between. . . shh.. . Real talk love is a feeling we have no control over when it’s on you it’s on you and if he or she does not know you and this love: they couldn’t possibly be your true match. There’s much that could be said much that we say we will do. Honestly, if your heart is not into and it’s just a pass time, someone or something to do? How much of your life are you willing to waste? Ask yourself why don’t you want or desire the bond between Man and Woman a bond even Beyonce’ couldn’t break up and for the ladies dude from Antwone Fisher, but you understand the point I hope. I’ll tap back in and hope to read more comments and gather a better sense of Relationships, making it work, love, men whatever WE choose the Wrd on the Streets to be or shall I say what we considere to be SUPER-EXTRA!
Gone
March 17th, 2009 at 5:31 pm
great post